I know I've made a few failed attempts at coming/being "back" but I'm sooo for real this time. My life has finally come to somewhat a lull and now, after about six months, I'm officially back to my passion...YOU GUYS!!! Well, talking to you guys. Hehe.
I know my last couple posts were a little all over the place, but I promise things get better. And I mean sooo muuuch betteeer. I've had a lot of changes take place in my life. A LOT! So now, I would like to take this opportunity to bring you guys up to speed. Are you ready? This may get a little lengthy.
A couple posts ago, you guys got a chance to read about my loathing feelings for cancer and how it has affected my family. The part that I didn't get a chance to mention was the fact that my mom was also burdened by the horrible disease. My mother was first diagnosed with breast cancer almost five years ago; and this past January, she recieved her forth diagnosis. And just as she did with the three before it, she took the news with a grain of salt. You see, my mom never thought of herself as sick. I promise, if you asked her, all she would tell you was that she was"whole and healed". However, this last diagnosis came in right on the heels of a very grueling lung surgery that she had in December and not to mention it was classified by the doctors as stage 4. Now, hearing the words stage 4 cancer didn't scare us. Mainly because her second diagnosis back in the spring of 2010 was also stage 4, but when doctors looked up in September of that year, they could find no trace of it. So like I said, hearing stage 4 didn't scare us. Actually, to be quite honest, none of it scared us. My family had been down that dark path so many times that it was like skipping down the yellow brick road. You see, my mom always made sure that we didn't let the things of this world have more credit than their worth. Her outlook on life was that "Everything works together for the greater good." So, in spite of it all, she knew that something great would come from her affliction; whether it was in this lifetime or the after.
In the midst of all of this, after what felt like a lifetime of pure begging (and some of you would be happy to know), this past May, my wonderful company allowed me to work remotely!!! That's right...I got to keep my job and work from pretty much anywhere that had an internet connection! Have I told you guys I love my company? No? Well, I love my company! Amaaaazing company to work for. So of course, I took that opportunity to put my possesions away in storage and move back home to spend time with my mother. Ain't God good?!?! You can't tell me he ain't!
I got to spend the next three months with the most amazing woman in the world ever known to mankind. Every morning I would walk into her bedroom and she would greet me with her light bearing smile and she would bless me daily with her nuggets of wisdom. It broke my heart to see the way cancer destroyed her body; but it deepend my faith in the Lord Jesus Christ to see that it could bear no weight on her spirit. Never once did she complain about the pain and discomfort; nor did she ever ask God why her. Every day she would thank Him for chosing her to be the vessel in which He chose to do his work. How can one deny the power of God when witnessing His greatness first hand? I couldn't.
Although my family and I no longer feared cancer, we never thought that it's horrible effects would take hold so quickly. My mom was rushed to the hospital on the afternoon of Friday, July 15, after a couple days of not eating and extremely intense pain. Saturday, July 16, 2011 at 11:30 pm was the last time I saw life in her eyes. After telling her I loved her and making sure she returned the exchange, I regretfully left her side at the hospital after being instructed by my dad to go home and get some rest. It was 1:05 am when I got the call from my dad saying that she had left us.
Seven.seventeen.eleven. On the wee hours of this day, this world lost a great woman. The education sector lost an amazing mentor. My family lost it's backbone. My son lost his GiGi. I lost my mom. My mom. Shelia Burgess.
So yes, a lot has changed since we were all here. The loss of my mom would've been enough to write a book over, but it was actually only a part of the upheaval that has taken place in my life these past couple months. Now, I get to tell you why I've changed my name and am now blogging from Missouri. But you gotta come back to find out.
it made me smile at the funeral on how strong anf brave you and nina and chas and uncle barry were ! .. thats just what she would've wanted .. she didnt want anyone to cry for her !
ReplyDeletei <3 my tete