Introducing...UNCOMMON GROUND!!!!

Well, now that the cat's out of the bag and you all know that I'm officially Mrs. Mr. Marcus, I think it's time that you guys finally hear from the man himself! Mr. Marcus will be making a grand appearance right here on CR!!! But, I'll even do you one better...he'll, actually, be here at least once a week, chiming in as the other half of what we're calling Uncommon Ground. Don't you love that??? Are you excited???? I'm so excited about this that containing myself isn't an option!

You know how when you sit down with a bunch of friends, especially when both male and female are present, everyone always ends up in a debate about "how there are no more good men left out in the world" or "why do females front about their level of sexuality" or "why does he have to play the video game aaaaaall the time" or "what turns you on" or my all-time favorite, "...cause that's what a man's supposed to do". Well, Uncommon Ground will be where we share our perspectives on these never-die topics. There's never a dull moment when these things come up when we're with our friends, so I figured the same would apply right here in blog land. DISCLAIMER: We are not proclaiming or pretending to be experts on the social/emotional interactions of the human male and female (well, Mr. Marcus might, but I sure in the heck am not!); these are only the intellectual endeavors shared by two non-common people that enjoy the thrill of the debate when it comes to "he vs. she". You can take some of it as advice...maybe some as entertainment...or take it with a grain of salt. No biggie! But you'll regret not tuning in every week to see what we got up! It's gonna be huge! It's gonna be epic!! It's gonna be Oprah worthy!!! [if she was still on air, of course] Just tune in...you won't be disappointed.

We're about to jump into one of those illusive topics, but before we do, y'all know I have let my honey formally introduce himself! So without further adieu, I give you Mr. Marcus:

Wow, ummm how do I began?  First, I guess I'll say, baby I love you; second, hello to the readers of Cohesive Randomness and thank you for supporting my wife; third, I'll say, if you want to have a healthy and enjoyable relationship or marriage, you should forget everything you think you know about how it's "SUPPOSED" to work; and lastly, have an open mind about everything we discuss in these segments.  I know some of you will hate me and some of you will love me, but all of you will enjoy the experience of being a part of Uncommon Ground.  I want these to be interactive sessions, so please Facebook us your questions, concerns and experiences and let's walk through this Male vs Female thing together.  I hope you all are ready because I've been waiting a long time for an opportunity like this. (Evil Laugh) 

OK, so for our first topic, we'll start at the beginning....

WHAT ARE WE actually LOOKING FOR IN A MATE? REALLY???

COCO: The argument always goes like this: women are looking for Mr. Tall Dark & Handsome/Knight in Shining Armor/Prince Amazing/Captain Save a H*% or whatever you want to call him. We want a good looking man that can rescue us from whatever situation we're currently in (whether it be emotional, financial, etc.) and give us the life that we grew up seeing in all of the Disney princess movies. He only needs to give us everything we want and defend our honor when it's at stake. Men, on the other hand, are looking for Ms. Halley Berry/Betty Crocker/Michelle "Africa" Tucker (Google her [parental discretion is advised] mmhmm). They want the trophy that can cater to his belly and the bulge in his pants. And if she don't talk, that's even better. Point blank period! Now I know this is the beyond extreme version of this argument, however, one can not deny its truthfulness. Even I had to sit in deep thought and ponder my thoughts and beliefs before today. Now, never would I ever say the things I said above. But after thinking on it a while, I realized that it was exactly what I believed subconsciously. And I know a lot of you may disagree with my statement, but a lot of your actions prove its undoubted point...we want what we think is best for us...THE BEST. And it's as simple as that.

MR. MARCUS: It's funny that my wife made a reference to Michelle Tucker (a female porn star) and introduced me as Mr. Marcus (who is also a porn star) and I like to think we have some common traits (grin).  OK I say that women don't know what it is that they are looking for.  They know what sounds good or what looks good on paper but I can tell you that over half of the women who say they know what they are looking for are with someone who completely fails the pre-employment pre-relationship screening.  Somehow, Mr. tall, dark, handsome and financially stable looks more like Mr. light bright, broke with 3 kids, and unemployed.  Men on the other hand don't want Halle Berry or Michelle Tucker for a mate, we just want the experience.  Men want Mrs. Honey I cooked dinner/Mrs. Baby here's the remote/Mrs. sex is not a gift it's a part of the "deal" (the "deal" being marriage).  OK so now that we have a general idea of what men and women want from a male a female perspective why is it that the majority of people don't find it?  It's because we choose a mate based on the impressions of those around us.  How many of you are in a relationship or have been with someone that your friends approved of and you are dreading it?  I can bet a lot of hands are up.  Nobody knows what makes you happy but you.  Who gives a s#!t if he is not 6'2 or that she has a little back fat, it's called character lol.  If they make you feel differently than any other person and they are willing to put their flaws in front of you, they deserve a chance.  A fair chance, not a BS sympathy chance, which is really no chance at all. For real.

Alright. Have we stepped on any toes? Are we speaking to anyone directly? Tell us! Let us in. We'd love to hear what you have to say. We just want to know...what are you really looking for in a mate?



Got any topics you want us to discuss on UNCOMMON GROUND? Feel free to leave it in the comment section, message us on Facebook (Coco = Carmeon Andrea & Mr. Marcus = Marcus Hamilton) or shoot us an email at cohesiverandomness@gmail.com. Nothing's off limits!!!

If this isn't love...Part...???

Hello. My name is Carmeon Hamilton and I'm married and living in "Big Mayberry", MO.

If you're new to Cohesive Randomness, then welcome to my favorite pastime!!! If you're a follower of Cohesive Randomness (which is about 12 really nice people), you're probably thinking right now, "WHAT THE HELL?!?!" I know, I know. And I'm sorry. But please allow me to thoroughly explain myself.

Now, I know that everyone loooved reading all of the "If this isn't love" posts (at least that's what I heard). And trust me, they were my favorite posts to write. So much so, that every time I attempted to write the next installment (i kid you not, it was about 12 times...no lie), I just felt like it wasn't good enough. That part of my life is so freakin hard to chronicle due to all of the twists and turns that took place. Not to mention that my life, in real time, over the past 8 months or so, was so crazy that I barely had the time to even pick up my laptop. But, please, don't go into cardiac arrest just yet. My spidey senses are telling me that a few of you are having hearts palpitations, thinking I'm just going to skip over the most important part of the story. Breathe honey. Breathe. Woosaah (sp?). Anyway. Like I said, don't fret my dears. I promise to divulge every little micro detail from that time in my life all the way up to now.

I had an "ah ha" moment today after really taking the time to think about this blog in comparison to the current state of my life right now. I realized that not only am I about 9 months behind on my blog...as in really keeping up on my posting schedule of a least one post a day...I'm actually about 2 years behind in the timeline of my relationship story! Do you know that if continuing at the rate I'm going, it would take me almost 2 years to get you all up to speed with me in present day!!! Heeeeck naw! I know y'all love me and all, but ain't nobody gone be comin back here every 9 months to see if I've given an update!!! It just AIN'T GONE HAPPEN!!! I wouldn't do y'all like that. I love y'all too much!!! Fo real!

So I thought to myself, "Why don't I tell them about what's going on now, and then work my way backwards while telling what's going on everyday?!?!" (Did you get that?) It's the perfect solution!!! I get to tell you about my past, shed light on the good and bad of my relationship, sharing my lessons learned; and simultaneously, share the life lessons my present day relationship...and whatever the hell else I feel like talking about. Boom! Bam! Pow!!! Problem solved. Everybody wins!

Side note: now that I'm thinking about it, I should've given this post a different title. I'm not actually talking about my love life in the post. I feel like I'm rambling. Am I rambling? I just might be. I bet you $5 I'm rambling. Bet 5.Ooookaaay...where's the beef? Lmbo!

Confused? OK. My bad. Here we go...

Hello. My name is Carmeon Hamilton and I'm married!!!!

I, finally, married the man of my prayers and dreams. Yeeesss, daaahling, Mr. Marcus and I have officially tied the knot! The magical occasion happened on 9.10.11.







We had a small (and I mean, very small) ceremony and dinner reception at one of our favorite places in Little Rock, AR, called Brave New Restaurant. There were only about 35 of our closest family and friends in attendance, but that's exactly how we wanted it. Small, intimate, personal. Our wishes were to be surrounded by the people that not only loved and cared for us, but also had a personal investment in our relationship.

Now, you gotta know that we had lots and lots and LOTS of people upset with us for not inviting them to the wedding. And, I can definitely understand where they're coming from. However, I felt and feel that so many people get caught up in the tradition of a wedding: a over-the-top production with a huge reception, lots of food, drinks & dancing...basically, an overly expensive party; but, they tend to forget that some marital celebrations are just about the people that are actually getting married and their wishes. Don't get me wrong thought; it would've been nice to have a huge and extravagant shindig with over 250 family members, friends, classmates, co-workers, associates, and crashers, but it just wasn't what we wanted. We tried to stay true to our gut feelings; not tradition or what other people thought it should've been. And that's all there was to it. [insert Kanye West shoulder shrug]

We've been boom-tasticly (hehe) married for 2 months now and are living our new lives in the wooonderful state of Missouri. Poplar Bluff to be exact. It's quite the start for a pair of newlyweds and their kiddo. My honey's job transferred him here only two weeks before the wedding, so we've been drifting on the good Lord's wind ever since.

I can't wait to tell you about the town...show you guys the house...tell you what I do everyday, especially since I work from home now! So y'all come back now, ya hear!!!!

XOXO,
Coco